Who Am I ?
Currently I am 55 years old. I don’t profess to be an expert in anything. When I was a teenager and in those, “who am I?” and “how do I define myself?” years (come to think of it, I may still be in those years), I would tell myself, “I am not great at anything but pretty good in a bunch of other stuff.” One of the things I identified with as being pretty good at, was writing. As life unfolded in my 20’s, 30’s and 40’s, I signed up for a career that made me money and provided flexibility to raise a family but didn’t stoke any passions or my creativity in the way I wanted. I also raised three boys and while that endeavor did feed my soul, it left little time for self-reflection. Now in my 50’s, I find myself in the fall season of my life with a little more free time and a whole lot of life in the rear view mirror. That is why I created this blog. To be honest, it’s mostly for me (isn’t that true of most creative projects). You are probably here because I invited you and sent you a link to this site.
Maybe you will find my stories useful, heart-warming or a waste of time, either way, I am writing for myself and for others, who like me, may be processing and reflecting on how we ended up here: kids grown, career winding down and body aging, wondering, what next? I am hoping in this process, I will find some of my own wisdom and maybe give myself some advice, clarity and direction for the next phase of my life, but that may not happen either.
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Barbara Kosak-Schlaefer
But back to not being an expert in anything… This blog is not advice for you. It may not even be inspiration or answers. If you are looking for life advice, cue up a Brene’ Brown podcast. This is my pet project created in the basement of my house while I stare off at a beige wall or look up at the ceiling for words to appear. I can only share my personal experiences and perceptions of, in some cases, really hard shit, like losing my best friend/sister to cancer or losing my breasts to the threat of cancer. I will share not only loss but also experiences that filled me up like being the mom of a son with autism or the sister to three siblings with developmental disabilities. I also may get brave and share some other heavy stories like growing up with an emotionally abusive alcoholic father or the weird life of having nine siblings.
